"Angels we have heard on high..."
--Trad.
"...tell us to go out and buy!"
--Tom Lehrer, "A Christmas Carol"
Elizabeth corralled Luka as he closed the door of his locker and turned toward the door of the lounge, his coat in hand. "Dr Kovac, may I speak with you for a moment?" She seemed very uncomfortable speaking with him, and he wondered if she intended to yell at him some more. He'd tried to stay out of her way as much as possible, the last week or so, and he'd managed to avoid having to call for a surgical consult during the times that she was around. "I, ah, was out of line the other day, when I spoke to you the way I did. I should not have spoken to - well, yelled at - you the way I did, and certainly not in front of other people."
He nodded seriously. "I understand. You have a lot to worry about right now, with a very sick fiance, a wedding to plan - eventually - and a baby on the way. And on top of that, you have a surgical department to help run, schedules to maintain, and patients to treat."
He sighed as he walked away and heard Elizabeth begin to sniffle; he wasn't, by nature, a particularly vengeful or sadistic man, but he was disturbed to find that there was definitely a part of him that, in a way, enjoyed her distress - too many run-ins with her over the last year, he supposed. Ah well... as long as he didn't wind up going by that house later and going to bed with Elizabeth. He smirked at the thought, and shook his head. Time for you to go home and get some sleep, he scolded himself.
* * *
Luka perched on the bed, after setting the coffee safely on the dresser. "Kerrrrrrry...." he crooned, as he lowered the blanket and began rubbing her back.
"Nnnrfgh," she informed him grouchily, without moving a millimeter.
"C'mon. You're going to be late if you don't hurry up and get a shower. I made you some coffee - it's on the dresser here - and some breakfast, which is downstairs."
"Rmphgl. Why're you even awake at this hour - don't you have today off?"
"Yeah. But I'm coming in later today - get some work in, show up at the Christmas party, make that announcement we'd talked about earlier?" She raised her head from the pillow to stare at him owlishly.
"So, you're gonna hold me to that, huh?" She smiled at the look of confusion on his face, and reached for his hand. "Just kidding. God, I'm so tired." She sniffed delicately. "Why'd you bring your coffee in here? It smells awful!" That earned her an even more confused look, as he picked up the cup of coffee he'd set down, and sniffed it.
"This is your coffee." She sat up slowly, wavering slightly.
"Ugh... I must be coming down with flu again, then." Luka felt her forehead quickly.
"You are a little warm. I'll get you some aspirin and orange juice."
"Thank you. Uh, can you take the coffee with you, please?" He nodded, and deftly reached under the covers to give her a playful tweak. On the way out, he took a cautious sip, just in case he had accidentally used the wrong stuff... and winced at the offensively bland taste. Bleah!
* * *
Kerry sighed and stripped off the trauma gear, then headed wearily down the hall. She'd just finished lunch when the EMTs rolled in with the victim of the drunk driver - her earlier nausea had finally subsided, and she'd found herself going straight for the cafeteria's vegetable soup and a sandwich piled high with turkey, hummus, and sprouts - and the next forty-five minutes had been an exercise in futility, as she and Elizabeth and Dave worked their tails off, trying to save a man who seemed determined not to be saved; they'd done absolutely everything they possibly could (she figured that Elizabeth shouldn't have any more questions about Dave's general competence after today), but he had, it seemed, finally just given up, right there on the table, and Kerry had had to call it.
"Happy Christmas, Kerry!" Kerry turned to wave at Elizabeth, and paused to allow the British surgeon to catch up.
"Merry Christmas, Elizabeth. How's Mark doing?"
"Oh, he's... he's complaining about having to stay home. You know what big babies men can be when they're sick..." Elizabeth sniffled softly, her bravado suddenly deserting her, and Kerry patted her shoulder.
"It's going to be okay."
"You don't really believe that, do you?"
"I have to believe that it'll work out for the two of you," Kerry carefully began, "otherwise I'll go nuts worrying about him--" She broke off as she spotted Romano cruising the hallway. "Damn... weasel at 3 o'clock. Let's go in the bathroom, before he sees us." She ushered Elizabeth through the door, and handed her some tissues she had in the pocket of her labcoat.
"You're truly astounding, Kerry. Why on earth would you be carrying those around - have I been that obvious lately?"
"No, but we'd all be surprised if you weren't worried about Mark."
"Well, all right, but why are you carrying these around?" Kerry shrugged, and Elizabeth touched her shoulder hesitantly. "Everything's all right with you and Luka, isn't it?"
"Everything's terrific with us. I just-- I don't know. Maybe it's just that I feel freer to... feel, now that we're together, and it's out in the open, but I get so emotional sometimes. I feel like I'm all over the place."
"Really." Elizabeth was intrigued - she still remembered her conversation with Dr Chen, from a month ago.
"What? What are you thinking, Elizabeth?"
"Well, it's just... Kerry, have you taken a pregnancy test lately?"
"Pregnan-- you think I could be...? My god, I never even considered that." Her hand went to her abdomen, as though she might have suddenly begun to show in the last few minutes. This is your waist, she thought. Remember it - you might not see it again for a long time!
"Never?" Elizabeth couldn't help a sly grin, even though she was still a little teary. "You and Luka haven't ever--" Kerry blushed.
"Well, uh, I mean, that is, of course we have, but, uh, we always-- almost always... oh god."
Elizabeth gave Kerry an appraising look. "It makes sense, Kerry. You look like you're starting to fill out a little, and you just told me about having mood swings... have you been at all nauseated lately? Any strange cravings?"
"I've been a little queasy lately," she admitted. "I just thought I might have another case of flu, or maybe mild food poisoning from somewhere. And now that you mention it, the last few weeks I've been making a side-trip to this Croatian bakery before my shifts and picking up a dozen little pastries... and finishing them off by the time I get to work."
"There you are! Junior's obviously hankering for a little something from the homeland." Kerry giggled.
"Really? I thought I was just being a pig."
"Look, do you want to meet for coffee - or, I guess, something else, in our case - after work? I'm on till seven."
"I'd like that. I'm on until 6:30, so...."
"So you'll--" Elizabeth prompted.
"Yes, I'll take a pregnancy test. Um... is it... true what they say?"
"Well, if you're referring to the part about getting really, really horny... oh, yes!" Kerry blushed again, and they both started laughing. "Oh, I needed my spirits lifted a bit, Kerry, thanks. And congratulations." Kerry smiled, and looked away for a moment; she wasn't used to the "girl talk" that the other women at County (for that matter, most of the women she'd known since her teen years) seemed to take for granted with each other.
Kerry's clumsy attempts to form close friendships with her female coworkers had, with one exception, been repelled: she'd tried to reach out to Anna, by asking for the other woman's opinion of her perfume, but Anna had unwittingly insulted her choice. Befriending Jeanie had been easier, since Jeanie was, in general, so quiet and retiring that she didn't have - or at least, didn't seem to have - close confidantes. But Jeanie had only allowed Kerry so far into her life - she'd ignored Kerry's fumbling efforts to set her up with various good-looking men, and she hadn't seemed aware of Kerry's hurt, when she'd got back together with Al without filling Kerry in on the "juicy" details... after all, weren't female friends supposed to "dish" about these things? And yet, Kerry had kept trying... trying to be there for Jeanie after her hepatitis was diagnosed, and even (although Jeanie didn't know about it, and with luck never would) persuading Adele to let Jeanie have Carlos. At least Jeanie and Reggie seemed to be doing well with the little boy.
The one exception, though... that had been a real shock to her, to discover that Kim had been in love-- well, had a crush on her, anyway. She didn't really want to think about that, though!
"I don't know anything for sure yet," she said shyly.
"Of course you don't! But if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck--"
"It's probably Malucci?" Elizabeth howled with laughter, and suddenly dashed into one of the stalls, but her voice floated out.
"Stop it! God, I think we're going to have to start avoiding each other in the next few months, if we're going to make each other laugh this much!"
"Junior's doing a little dance on your bladder?"
"I swear, sometimes I think she thinks it's her own personal punching bag."
"So you know that it's a girl?"
"Well... it's never 100%, of course, but my OB/GYN seems to think so, from the looks of the ultrasound."
"Maybe there's something in the hospital's water supply," Kerry sighed. "You, me, Janesha in Radiology... at this rate, they'll have to build another wing to the daycare center." She hesitated a moment. "Have you had any 'strange cravings'?"
"Well, as a matter of fact, I have. It's not very nice, though, I'm not sure you want to hear it."
"Probably not, but I'm curious now."
"Well... all right. Every once in a while, I get an urge... just this powerful desire... to eat a peanut butter and bacon sandwich."
"Peanut butter? And... bacon?"
"Yeah," Elizabeth enthused. "Crunchy peanut butter on whole wheat toast, with bacon cooked just long enough to be safe, but still limp... god, I could really go for one right now!" Kerry stood there and tried to absorb what Elizabeth had described, then charged into the handicapped stall and promptly lost her lunch. "Kerry? Are you all right?" Kerry heard the other toilet flush and the door of the other stall open, but didn't dare leave the sanctuary of the nice cool porcelain bowl... not when she wasn't sure she was done.
Elizabeth went to Kerry, who was hunched over the toilet, and sympathetically crouched down to rub her back comfortingly. "At least you hadn't finished for the day," she offered. "Your hair..." Kerry laughed, and trembled from the occasional spasms that were still shaking her gut.
"Oh, I learned about that very early. I once-- ugh! had my hair get in the way - it was even longer than it is now, and I hadn't yet learned about tying it back the moment I-- ngh! arrived." She spat into the bowl, and looked up at Elizabeth miserably. "I hate throwing up."
"I think I'd be worried about you if you didn't hate throwing up!" Kerry smiled weakly and accepted the wad of toilet paper Elizabeth offered her, and swabbed her mouth.
"I hate anything where I don't have full control," she reluctantly admitted. "Including being sick."
"I know what you mean! Here. Let me help you up." Elizabeth got the much smaller woman hoisted to her feet, and leaned over to hit the flush lever. "You look a little tired..." Kerry yawned, and shook her head.
"Oh, please don't remind me. At least my being pregnant would explain why I've had a hard time lately, getting started in the morning."
"Yeah. Hey, at least you weren't sick in front of other people, in the middle of a trauma!"
"Thank heavens for small favors," Kerry said dryly.
* * *
Randi looked up from her work, and saw Dr Kovac on his way in. He was dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt, under that big black coat of his, and was as magnificent a sight as ever... nice long legs, solid, built like a fine racehorse. She just hoped that Dr Weaver appreciated him! "Hey, Dr Kovatch. I thought you weren't on today?"
"I'm not. But I wanted to get some work done, maybe stay for the party." His gaze, though, wandered until it fell on Kerry, who was talking with Elizabeth, and Randi grinned.
"Ahhh. Gotcha." Luka rolled his eyes in exasperation.
"Oh, and Randi? It's 'Kovac'. Not 'Kovatch'." She stared at him blankly, and he shook his head. "Would you just call me 'Luka', then? I keep trying to get people to be informal with me, but..." he shrugged helplessly, and they watched Dave joking around with Malik and Yosh. "How does Dave manage to get people to call him 'Dr Dave'?"
"Probably because they don't respect his abilities as a doctor," Randi told him cynically. "Besides, you just don't come across as someone to call by your first name. More like... oh... a general, or some kind of religious figure. Like a saint or something." Luka snickered.
"I'm no saint, that's for sure! And Dave's a better doctor than he's given credit for." Randi snorted indelicately.
"Huh! Keep that up, and people are going to start thinking that you're engaged to Dave, instead of Dr Weaver."
"Randi," he said quietly, "we haven't even announced that yet. How'd you know... and how many other people know?"
"Overheard Carter on the phone, the other day, talkin' about it. But if anyone else knows, it's not because I told 'em!"
"Okay. We'll be announcing our engagement at the Christmas party. You swear you won't say a word about it until then?"
"Hey," she told him firmly, "I can keep a secret. Besides, Dr Weaver's cool: she was the only one who had the guts to ask me, to my face, why I served time in prison."
"You--?" He shook his head. "For- forget it. It doesn't matter."
* * *
Luka had emerged from the lounge to get some more charts, and awkwardly stepped around Elizabeth as the phone rang and Randi picked it up. "Dr Corday! Phone."
"Uh... thank you, Randi. This is-- What? Are you certain? But... that's fantastic! We'll-- yes. Of course! Yes. Yes, he is." Elizabeth put the handset of the telephone down on the counter, her hands shaking and her face pale. "My God. I don't believe it."
"What is it, Elizabeth? Is something wrong with Mark?" She started a little at Luka's concerned question, but let out a surprised little laugh - over the last few weeks, she'd become half-convinced that she'd forgotten how to be happy!
"No... no. Quite the opposite, in fact. It seems there's an experimental course of treatment in New York. Somehow Mark's case was submitted to them, and they agree that he's a perfect candidate. They want us to travel out there as soon as we can. Oh... Mark wants to talk to you." She picked up the phone and handed it over.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Luka. I want to ask a very big favor of you and Kerry." Mark's voice sounded tired, and Luka wondered if medication was taking its toll - he knew, after all, that Dilantin could cause drowsiness.
"Okay," he said neutrally.
"If something happens to me, I want you and Kerry to keep an eye on Elizabeth and the baby. Make sure they're all right, help them in any way that you can." Luka frowned, and glanced over at Elizabeth, who wore an ear-to-ear grin for what seemed like the first time in months. "Promise me, Luka," Mark insisted after a few moments of silence.
"Yes, yes... I promise. But nothing is going to happen to you. You'll do very well, and you'll be back to work in no time... you'll see." There was a weary little sigh from the other end.
"Thank you. And you won't mention this to Elizabeth, will you? I don't want to worry her."
"Of course not. You're... uh... all right otherwise? No blackouts or neurological problems that you've noticed?"
"No. Just a little trouble sleeping." Mark said, and laughed darkly.
"Mm. That's understandable. Do you want me to prescribe something to help you sleep? You should probably try to get some rest before your trip...?"
"Nah. I'll be all right. But thanks anyway."
"Do you want to talk to Elizabeth again?"
"Nah. She's got work to do. We'll celebrate when she gets home."
"Okay. Take care of yourself, Mark, eh? We'll see you when you return."
"You bet. Bye, Luka."
"Bye."
* * *
Chuny, Haleh, and Randi cornered Dave at the admit desk at one point. "What do you have planned for Christmas this year, Dave?" He shrugged.
“Not much. Maybe breakfast in bed with my, er, sweetie, then exchange presents and go for a walk in the snow." He glanced quickly over Haleh’s shoulder, and caught the eye of his "sweetie" for a moment.
"Breakfast in bed? What, are you going to make the poor girl cook waffles in the nude?" Chuny snickered at Haleh’s indignant question.
"And when are we gonna get to meet this mystery girl? C’monnn... tell us something about her!" Dave shrugged again.
"I don’t wanna jinx it! Maybe you guys will luck out, and we’ll get mugged, too - then you can find out."
"Hey, just tell us if she works at the hospital!"
"No! I’m not gonna say anything!"
"Betcha it’s one of those girls who came looking for him, earlier this month." That was Randi’s snide opinion, and Dave shook his head in disgust.
"Whatever you guys wanna think, okay? I got patients to see." He picked up the chart he'd been studiously ignoring for the last few minutes, and stalked away. Randi watched him walk off, and raised an eyebrow.
"Whoa. We'll have to tease him about his lovelife more often, if it gets him to work like that!" The three of them shared a laugh, and looked around for someone else to bug.
* * *
Haleh decided that since Chicago was cooperating for the time being, and staying away, it would be a good time to start handing out the Secret Santa presents. So, Malik hauled out the boombox and threw in the Etta James CD ("Twelve Songs of Christmas") that Kerry had brought in - at a low volume, of course - and Haleh hauled out the sack of presents. Dave had had a Christmas CD that he wanted put on, but Luka had given him a meaningful look... at which point Dave's Christmas CD had gone back into his locker.
"Probably includes some cheerful Christmas song like 'Santa Gunned Down a Cop'," Cleo whispered to Peter, who snickered softly.
"This should go well, since 'Santa Carter' wasn't in charge and didn't give away all the presents this year," Dave - who'd quickly got over the disappointment of not being able to play his new Rage Against The Machine holiday CD ("Guerilla Claus", with cuts like "Merry F---in' Christmas" and "Roast Rudoph") for the others - cracked, and Haleh threw his present at him. "Ow!" He quickly unwrapped it, and exclaimed in delight. "Wow! Whoever my Secret Santa is, thank you very much!"
"What'd you get?" Luka asked. "'Emily Post's Etiquette'?" Dave held up his present. "Oh, a pornographic connect-the-dots book. How, uh, nice." He snickered, and Kerry swatted him. He kissed her.
Kerry got a pair of earrings in the shape of tiny lions, and promptly put them on. Luka whispered in her ear, that he'd like to see her wearing only those earrings, and she blushed. Luka got a scarf - black, with the Croatian red-and-white checkerboard pattern repeating down the center - and threw it around his neck right then... it was, he thought, absolutely one of the tackiest things he'd ever seen, but he kinda liked it. Kerry whispered in his ear that she'd wear just the earrings if he'd wear just the scarf.
* * *
Once all the presents had been distributed, and the bag put away, Luka stood up before everybody had a chance to disperse. "I'm almost disappointed that Kerry got earrings," he began. There were three people present who knew what he was about to say, and they had been sworn to secrecy. "I have jewelry for her, as well - she has apparently taken leave of her senses, because she has agreed to marry me."
There was a moment of stunned silence that was finally broken when Dave gravely came over, shook both their hands, and suddenly let loose with a series of war whoops, leaping around the admit area like a... a... Luka searched his memory for the right English word. Doofus. That was the word - he'd had a young patient recently who'd introduced him to words like "doofus", and he had to admit that he liked it.
He got up and went into the lounge, and quickly returned with a small velvet box. They'd gone ring-shopping last week, but hadn't been impressed by the selection in the big-name jewelry stores... they'd found themselves checking out little, out-of-the-way places.
It was a fairly seedy pawnshop, in fact, where they found The Ring - a platinum filigree ring with tiny diamonds. Kerry hadn't openly expressed interest in it, but Luka noticed the way her eyes widened in fascination at the sight of it... even as she was asking to see something different - and cheaper - he overrode her and had the shopkeeper bring out the ring that really had her eye. He gently slid it onto her finger, and it went right on - it might as well have been made for her. She made a strange little squeaking noise, that he took as an indication of approval.
"Yeah. This is the one." She moaned softly in protest when he went to remove it, to put it back in its box, even crooking her ring finger to hold onto it. "C'mon, Kerry. You'll get it back at the party, huh?"
The shopkeeper watched them closely, and wondered if the large, obviously foreign, man was some kind of gangster, as readily as he wrote the check for the ring, with all those zeroes. The redhead looked like a funny choice of moll - walked with a crutch, not conventionally pretty, had strangely conservative taste in jewelry - but what the hell... maybe she was a tiger in the sack!
Luka had been unaware of the shopkeeper's speculations - fortunately for the shopkeeper! - and had glanced around the place idly as they waited... he had no idea that his casual perusal had, to the paranoid shopkeeper, looked like a gangster sizing up a new acquisition. All he'd noticed was that the guy suddenly decided that no further calling was necessary on the check, and that the ring was now theirs.
He knelt in front of Kerry - romantic, yes, but also a helluva lot more comfortable than bending over - and slid the delicate ring onto her finger... then kissed her hand, for good measure. "We're official now, I guess," he whispered to her while he was still on the floor in front of her, then smiled as she nodded, and played with his hair.
* * *
Luka groaned and slapped the last chart closed, then flopped back in his chair to loll there for a moment before he gathered up everything he'd checked, coded, and signed in the last several hours, and carried it out to the front desk. "Well! Somebody's sure been busy," Randi said, as he handed her the stack.
"Yep." He spotted Kerry, and wandered over to talk to her. "I'm going to head home, now. Would you like me to pick up anything at the store on the way?"
"Uh... yeah. Can you pick up some fruit? A couple of cantaloupes and a papaya or two... and a few mangoes--"
"In other words, ingredients for your shakes? I'll pick up some ginger, too, to help settle your stomach, but if this doesn't ease up soon, I want to get you in for a checkup, hm?" She wanted to tell him what she had in mind to find out in a little while, but she didn't want to get his hopes up... or scare him... or whatever his reaction would be, before she was absolutely sure.
* * *
Dave emerged from Exam 1. "Anybody seen the Chief? I need her to sign off on this chart."
Haleh snorted at him. "I think she's in the bathroom. Go find Dennison, if it's so damn urgent you can't wait a couple of minutes."
"And where's he?" Haleh rolled her eyes.
"Do I look like his mother?"
"I doubt it," Dave muttered, almost under his breath.
"Check. The. Board, Malucci," Haleh snarled at him.
"Oh, hey, the board!" he exclaimed, as though the idea were a revelation from on high, and dashed away laughing as Haleh narrowed her eyes and growled at him. It had to be some kind of divine punishment, she decided, that she'd inherited her very own thorn-in-the-side, pain-in-the-ass doctor from Carol.
Meanwhile, Kerry watched as the test finished developing, and rubbed
nervously at her face, a gesture she'd picked up from Luka - the test could
be wrong, but it probably wasn't... she was pretty sure that she could
take it a thousand times, and it would turn out the same way every
time....
POST-OPERATIVE NOTES: